wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize