You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Randomize