Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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