I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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