he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Randomize
