summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
