yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
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