Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Randomize
