Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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