ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
Randomize
