Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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