glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
Randomize
