that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
