Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
Randomize
