Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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