I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
