when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
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