OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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