We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
Ketchup is God's man juice
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Your penis caused this!
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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