he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky