erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Randomize
