Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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