I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
