There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize