My brain says no but my pants say off.
I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
