You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
they're like a gay fantastic four
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize