I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
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