My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
You made out with two different species that night
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.