Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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