i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Why is there uncooked bacon under my bed?
You insisted on taking it to bed with you. You grabbed it out of the fridge while mumbling "If I leave this out, you fuckers are just going to ruin it."
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Randomize
