i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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