Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
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I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
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I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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