I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
