If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Brb crying the tears of my youth
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Randomize