do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I should be sponsored by Trojan
I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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