this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
