I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
