You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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