you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
do nipples grow back?
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