At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
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I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
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i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
He? As in you personified your dick?
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
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