just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
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