Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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