Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
