no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
