I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
These 21 Drunks Said The Darndest Things
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
These 25 Irresponsible People Blew All Their Cash On Drugs, Booze, & Sex
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"