Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
