I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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