yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
