i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
I just referred to our excessive fireball consumption as a team building exercise and everyone in group text agreed.
We're not alcoholics, we're a god damn team.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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