There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
